Happiness in Sadness

It had been a week, or a little longer, I always lose track of time when I’m in Austria. I was surrounded by beauty, support and pure love from my other “family”. I could feel it and I knew I was safe, I knew I was loved for being me and I was so content.

I continued to go daily to my bestie’s mom’s home. I would do a little assessment, I would run her feet and legs for hours. We would talk a little and laugh a little. I could tell she wasn’t ready and she was sad. I valued my time with her. It made my heart gush that there was something I could do for her, even though it was so very minimal. It seemed like forever that this went on. I prayed for peace, I prayed for wisdom, I prayed for energy to take any pain away. I watched my bestie struggle with all aspects of this major event in her life. In many ways this process was the most difficult thing I had ever seen, however, in many ways it was beautiful. They way in which it touched everyone was so different, so purposeful. I reflected daily on the events.

I was doing yoga, I was taking long walk, even jogs around the field. I was eating real foods. I felt amazing. I was doing the work my book required (we will get into the book and my fears and my practice shortly).

And then it happened. She was gone. She no longer suffered, she no longer struggled…….SHE WAS FREE!!!! To say this woman was influential to me would not quite suffice. I so deeply admired her work ethic, her strength, her commitment, her smile and I learned so much from her. It was a stinger, but I could not be happier that I was there and helped in any minor way. The following weeks were services and a reception. All were lovely. My German, well sometimes it is good and sometimes it is just fair. However, I was told that she wrote that she regretted not working less, having more fun, basically following her dreams. This hot me like a ton of bricks. My life back in the US was a series of have to’s and anything to get through. But NOT ANYMORE. I was going to live the heck out of life. Seize every moment. Smell every smell, feel every surface, experience emotion fully and explore it. I was ready for the sensations of a sensational life.

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